Play this while you read!
Boo! Step into the neon-lit labyrinth of a queer, Afro-futuristic nightmare. Welcome to the first episode of “Man in a Dress: The Making of a Playable Podcast.” It was an honor to debut this piece (of my soul) at the Resonate Festival in Richmond Virginia as part of the brilliant lineup of Written Air’s Issue #0 performance. How I introduced the piece there is how I’ll do it here because: 1) I love consistency, and 2) B*$% I worked hard on that s@#! ya dig? Shooo. Anyhew:
”I stand here uncertain on the edge of words, sifting through the terror for the purpose like lentils in ashes. Back in 2018, I wore a skirt for the first time in public, and a stranger threatened my life because of my clothes. Trying traditional storytelling methods to explain how that felt couldn't cut it. The raw emotion, the fear, the defiance—they all seemed to slip through the cracks of conventional narratives. So, I decided to take a leap into the unknown, crafting an audio-first, choose-your-own-adventure video game that's also the first playable true crime podcast. In this game, you will collectively play as me, using your voice to operate the game and help me navigate one of the worst nights of my life.”
But why a game? Why this format? Why, why, why!?
Where Else Was It Supposed to Go?
I didn’t know where to put these emotions, this moment, my story. With my previous work, His Saturn Return, I knew. I knew. Duran hit me like lightning and I bent it onto paper as an audio drama. But Man in a Dress felt like a flooding over time in a room with no doors or windows. It’s been threatening to consume me for a while now and I couldn’t do anything about it.
It wasn’t until Dennis Funk asked me to pitch an idea for the Resonate performance that I realized I was drowning. This idea floated to the top first. Originally, it was just going to be a brief one-person show or a short, horror audio drama. But both felt disconnected. I struggled to write out how my brain works, what I was thinking, the context behind the choices I made that night, when I realized it wasn’t enough to watch from the sidelines. I needed you to feel it. Interact with it. That’s when I realized it needed to be a video game.
What’s in a Dress?
At its core, my game is:
Audio-first: The soundscape is crucial, immersing you in the vibrant yet threatening New Orleans nightlife.
Choose-your-own-adventure: Your decisions shape the narrative, leading to multiple possible outcomes.
Voice-operated: Your spoken commands drive the action, making the experience uniquely personal.
These elements combine to create a true crime podcast you don't just listen to—you live it.
The Episode Format: A Development Journey
This Substack series is more than just a dev blog. Each post will serve as an "episode" in the creation of "Man in a Dress." You'll get:
Behind-the-scenes insights/education of game development
Snippets of the story and character introductions
Explanations of key gameplay mechanics
Opportunities to influence the game's direction
Your engagement is crucial. Your engagement is crucial. I’ll say it one more time: your engagement is crucial. This game is a celestial body, orbiting the collective consciousness of its players. Your feedback, ideas, and concerns are the cosmic forces that shape its trajectory. Starting with:
The rose imagery stems from the threat Green Hat gives to Sai (weird saying that) in the show:
My poor precious rose. You don’t belong in this…concrete. You belong in a flower bed - mine.
Next time I see you, I'll put my hands on you and I won't stop—not until I've planted you in the soil of my soul. Have your fun now, get lost in every moment, but don’t worry…
What's Next?
I’m currently working on a way to bookmark the episodes for you, so that you’ll be able to skip to specific parts of the game without starting from the beginning. It’s a bit abrupt but the game ends when you have to make a selection between your two friends. In my next episode, we'll dive deeper into why that is and the game's core mechanics, exploring how voice commands translate into in-game actions. We'll also introduce you to some of the key characters you'll meet on this harrowing night out.
I’m building this as I go, so I hope you’ll give me grace as this show becomes more polished over time.
Thank you for joining me on this journey. Together, we're not just making a game—we're crafting a new way to understand and share deeply personal experiences. Stay tuned, stay vocal, and remember: dark matters.